Funny Short Stories
The Diary of a First Grade Teacher

Funny short stories from my diary - The Diary of a First Grade Teacher - are included here. These are true incidents that happened in my first grade classroom. These kiddos are too cute!

City Mouse - Country Mouse

Teachers, talk about transfer of learning ... Here's another funny short story that I just HAD to write down.

After reading the book, The City Mouse and the Country Mouse, I took my class outside to recess.

We hadn’t been out very long whenever Loegan ran over to me and said that Ema had hit Martin.

Rushing to see them, I said, “What’s going on here?”

Ema folded her arms and stared at the sky.

“Awww, heck," Martin admitted, “I told her she looks pur-dy.”

Ema stomped her foot. “That’s not it!”

Martin gave her a quizzical look. "Huh?"

But Ema ignored him.

Suddenly he changed his posture and his attitude. “Look, Teacher, I was over he-ah playing and ..."

Then, it was if he remembered something ... Changing his face to a look of sweet innocence, he glanced up at me and continued. "And I was being good. And then, he-ah comes that PUR-DY girl ... Well, she pushed my back REAL HARD and called me a ugly name.”

“I did NOT!” Ema blasted.

“Uh-huh, you did,” Martin drawled, in his sweet Southern Mississippi accent. “She called me a COUNTRY HICK!”

Stepping closer to me, he motioned for me to lean over. Then, speaking so quietly I could hardly hear him, he confessed. “See, I don’t know what a country hick is, so I called her a city witch!


The Country Cousin [VIDEO]

Speaking of The City Mouse and the Country Mouse, here's a special treat for you ... It's from Walt Disney, 1936!


Learning to Read

For some children learning to read doesn't come easily.

In first grade there are an astounding number of words that the students must learn. Whenever someone hasn’t studied their new word list, it’s so obvious!

Today, at the reading group table, I nodded to Joe Joe. It was his turn to read.

Suddenly, he began rocking back and forth, heaving and hacking. He slid down in his chair, groaning and panting even louder.

What was all of this? You never know for sure, so I asked him, “Are you all right?”

Grabbing his throat and patting his little chest, he insisted, “I can’t read right now!”

Maybe I shouldn't have been surprised at his theatrics, but I found myself staring at him - in stunned silence - just like the other kiddos at the table.

Finally, he stood and shouted, "I'm 'bout to HUFF and PUFF myself to deaf ... I got to get out of here! And go catch my breaf!”

Computer Lab

After a long weekend, we returned to school and learned that the classroom we had called the computer lab had been moved to another classroom in our school.

As I was showing my kiddos the new location, Weesie glanced around at the new setup ...

Suddenly, she moaned, “AWWW, I like that old POOTERS' room bestest!

* * *

lol - I can always count on my students to pop up with some kind of hilarious remark ... And that's exactly why I have a diary full of funny short stories!


Work From Home With SBI!

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